At Last....

...NaBloPoMo is over. I wouldn't say I'd enjoyed the past month; in fact the opposite. It's really shown me how little I like blogging when every post has to be edited and deleted and re-edited again so as not to piss off or provoke any sort of outburst from anyone who happens to read it, which, these days, is a list of ex boyfriends and friends and family of the current one. I feel completely stifled, so much so I've been considering starting a private blog and simply deleting this one once and for all, but there'll still be people trying to find the new one. Censorship sucks. I started this blog having no one but randoms read it, and those were the days I miss - times when I could actually blog about things in my life without fear of upsetting someone or worry what distorted things I would hear back through the grapevine. I miss using my words to make me feel better, I miss having fun with what I wrote, and I miss being me. So it's goodbye NaBloPoMo, and quite probably, goodbye Made in Melbourne. And maybe, just maybe, hello to a new and uncensored blog. Still, I did it, and even though some nights were more of a chore than others, I'm glad I committed to something and saw it through, even though my creative juices haven't exactly been a-flowing.

It Starts With.Us

I received an email this morning from Twenty Something Bloggers, a group I belong to. I usually save those emails for later, but something made me open it up today. And I'm glad I did.

20SB are promoting a company they are working with, named It Starts With.Us and sent me a letter outlining what sort of things they do - and I was blown away. Basically, It Starts With.Us are promoting the idea that 'each and every one of us can change the world by touching the lives of people around us', otherwise known as 'decreasing worldsuck'. I love that - 'worldsuck'. Reading through their blog and missions, it actually sounds like a great idea with minimal pressure - it's about doing something (like suggestions they outline in their forums etc) for someone else that you may already be doing, such as helping prepare a meal for someone who's experiencing ill health, or just produced a small human being, and so on and so forth - basic, kind ideas that promote good karma, and as stated on their home page - when we hear more about the positive things others are doing, we become more aware of the opportunities we have to make a difference for the people in our own lives.

Simple but brilliant, no? The world always needs more love, and love breeds goods things (and not just the small human beings). I've signed up immediately, after moments before sending the gorgeous Boo an unhappy email regarding the state of some people in my life right now. I figure this is my way of bringing back a little happiness, and if I can do that to someone elses life, I might feel better about my own.

Take some time, peruse the website and blog, and think about it. It sure is a feel good factor knowing those emails will be arriving in my inbox giving me ideas about being a better person, and making the world a little better for someone else via an action most would take for granted.

Baking

The few remaining edible cookies...

Every Sunday, Cam starts off our day of laziness by doing a run to get the paper (my favorite day of the week, as it has not only the Wedding section, but Style Police AND my horoscope!) and usually eggs and bread so I can whip up our weekend tradition - scrambled eggs. It's got to be said, I make a mean brekkie, and like that I can add it to the list of things I can actually achieve without decimating too badly. After devouring noms and the paper (not literally, the latter), the inevitable question of "What do you wanna do today?" comes up, usually followed by "Dunno...what do you wanna do?"

This morning was no different. After tossing around some ideas about wandering around Chapel Street, meeting the gang for dinner or getting a 'real' coffee somewhere (unlike my freshly brewed 'fake' coffee, obviiously) we kind of settled for a day of doing nothing, really, but getting a lot done. One of those days where we don't actually go anywhere or do anything much, but tick off the chores and tasks that have been on the to do list for a while. Today that meant hanging the prints I had made up and framed on Wednesday, especially for the kitchen (red and white, naturally!) and moving the dryer, and for me, baking. I made an enormous batch of gingerbread men after being inspired by the adorable little GB men Cam bought back with him from the paper run (I do absolutely heart Gingerbread men, and it makes a difference from the red licorice I normally beg him to buy!) an after discarding about 3/4 due to burning, rising and general creepiness issues, I had about 10 left over to work with. I literally threw them in the oven for a 5 minutes and whipped them back out so they wouldn't catch fire and burn like the others seemed to. Although I was desperate for them to look professionally delicious (I had vague ideas for making them for the big family Christmas bash coming up), alas, they didn't turn out as well as expected. Nor did the batch of brownies I slaved over, put in the oven then realized I'd forgotten to add the 3 eggs the recipe stipulated. They've been in the oven for about an hour, the damn things just wont dry out. Maybe I should have left the eggs out, after all.

After my cookie/brownie dreams were dashed, I headed off to pay a visit to the horses, and ended up riding Darcy for about an hour, until I came home to the most delicious roast chicken Cam had slaved over whilst I was gone. Tonight we were going to take the dogs for a walk around the neighborhood to see all the Christmas lights (last night was the official 'opening' for the light shows) but it's absolutely pouring with rain, so while I wait for the brownies to cook (when? WHEN will that be?!) we're watching Monster Vs Aliens. Very cute!

Hope you've all had a great weekend!

2 days to go.

I am absolutely knackered. I fear I will be completely unable to form coherent sentences, so I tried uploading photos from my new camera from last nights shenanigans and today's bush-bashing jaunt, but alas, my incompetency has extended itself to not being able to do that, either. So, it's time for some shut eye, and tomorrow, an extra long post for the 2nd last day of NaBloPoMo. Even though I have posted absolutely nothing remotely interesting or even made particularly large posts, I'm pretty keen to not have the little devil/angel shoulder thing each night of "Have to blog" and then "But I'm too tiiiiiiiired".

My new bedroom

...complete with new bed, lamps and painted wall.

Storms, popcorn and puppy love.

I didn't believe this news article was real to begin with, but after reading a few lines and thinking about the lengths I would go to to get my puppies back, I thought I would share the love.

On a sidenote - I've had a brilliant day cooking up a storm with my Nan, chatting for hours with my mum (and getting a few early Christmas presents!) and will be completed with spending my night watching my dream man Robbie Williams on the ARIA Awards (I plan on muting it for just about everything other than Kate Miller-Heidke and him).

It's been crazy weather today - stormy, disgustingly muggy and sunny, then back to some super loud and electric storms on the way back home. I'm hoping it cools down soon so I can nom on some popcorn.

Today

* My new bed arrived today, along with the lamps. It looks even better than I'd imagined against my gorgeous Red Alert wall.

* Darcy stood on my footise today, and boy, is it sore. I don't know if my second littlest toe is broken, but it sure is painful.

* I'm driving down to Nan's tomorrow to make our annual Christmas pudding. We use the same bowl each year, one she's had since before my mother was born. I could never have the same sort of tradition; I'm far too clumsy.

* I went to the Mornington Market today in order to get some Chrissie presents, but ended up getting two new prints framed for the kitchen, a hand-made card for Boo and some pigs ears for the dogs. Hmmm.

* Cam's uncle is having a big birthday party this weekend, but I'm not so sure I'm going. It's in the back of beyond; things have been a bit tense since my outburst of insanity a few weekends back in front of his sister and well, there's a big display of Christmas lights being turned on in our local area. I'm considering inviting mum up for a girls afternoon followed by The Festival Of Lights, but I know that won't go down so well.

* I made an absolutely scrumptious pasta bake for dinner tonight - it was like a traffic light with the vege choices I threw in - then I went and wrecked all the goodness with an inch thick layering of cheese.

* The last few minutes of A Simple Wish was on whilst we put the bed together, and it reminded me of watching it years ago - that was the movie that first got me hooked on visiting Central Park.

Interview.

I had my interview today for my vet school application. I was super nervous, and practised possible answers to possible questions the whole way up, in between singing bits of Queen songs to calm my nerves. Once I got there, and had a chat with the various lizards, taxidermied birds of prey and quietly avoided the strange people I was waiting with, I calmed down a little bit, and was quietly pondering how I could place Betty, the Shingle Backed Lizard in my handbag when I was called in. I must say, it went fabulously well - a million times better than I had expected. I clicked with one of the women interviewing me right away, and by the time I'd pulled out photos of the dogs, cats, rats, birds, fish and horses I own and was merrily chatting about my large family, I knew I was set. Unfortunately, I won't know for sure until January 27th - and will actually start on January 28th if I am successful - as they have to give first preference to school leavers applying directly, rather than a mature age student like myself (MATURE age? AhahahHAHAhaHAhahAHA...). Still, I did my absolute best, and felt it went as well as humanly possible, and short of absolutely guaranteeing me a position, I know I made a great impression and will be offered the first place available if one comes up.

I had a lovely dinner with my Cam and Seah tonight to celebrate, and am looking forward to a good long nights sleep and an early morning ride before my new bed gets delivered tomorrow. Squeal! I also have to fit in my 3rd and final coat of Red Alert before it arrives... so the earlier to bed, the better. Night!

Boo! It's a present :)

I came home from a huuuuge walk with Phoenix (I must lose 5kg before NYE...I simply must) to a large parcel awaiting me on the doorstep. My first thought was 'eBay!' and then I scrapped that, as I'd already signed for my lovely big purchases earlier in the morning, and then I was reeeeally curious. If there's one thing I love, it's 'real' mail, and even better than 'real' mail is BIG mail (except, naturally, if that means it's a BIG bill. Yuk). In my enthusiasm to rip apart the packaging - I figured it was good practice for ripping my bigger Christmas gifts in a few weeks - I noticed the 'return to sender' address on the back, and gave a big squeal. 'Real' BIG mail from one of my favorite people, Boo! I must put a note here: Boo is actually Bec, a lovely and gorgeous girl from England who was buddies with my brother all through high school when we lived in the UK. They lost touch when we moved back to Australia, and one day, randomly, on Facebook, I received an email from said lovely and gorgeous girl, and we kinda clicked ourselves as I emailed her back saying I was, indeed, my brothers sister. We've emailed madly practically every day since, and I am proud to be able to call her one of my closest friends, even though I haven't seen her for *does some rapid mental arithmetic* hundreds of years. And, lets face it, I wasn't the most pleasant 8 year old running around back when I 'knew her', so I wouldn't suggest we were tight back in the day. In fact, due to her deep seated passion for Ice Hockey - something we both share - she often took my brother to ice hockey games, much to my horror and disgust - I couldn't imagine why my brother wouldn't let me tag along with them. (I must say, I worked that out for myself when I was 16 - who would want a chubby, irritating hanger-on-er-er following you around when you're so cool?) Anyway. I digress. In my parcel was a gorgeous card (see above!) which put a big smile on my fact, some cute British lollies & toys and...


Katie the Kitten Lindt chocolates. When we first 're-met' via email, I started calling Bec 'Beccy Boo Boo Boo'*, which was shortened to Boo, and she soon knew me simply as Kitten. So not only are these gorgeous little bits of kitty chocolate adorable AND delicious, they also put a massive grin on my face when I saw they were, in fact, my very own.

I cannot wait to fly on over to England in July and finally 'meet' my Boo again. And not only that... be in her wedding party! I am so thrilled to be planning our trip over - in the meantime, I need to get my ass in shopping mode and find her an equally adorable 'Aussie' gift for her!

*If you've seen How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days, you'll get this.

The Grand Plan

This is this skirt I was discussing in my previous post:

... I wondered what I would wear it with last night, for my big plans for NYE - then this morning, like a lovely little angel had been listening to my ponderings, I received an email from Wittner, clearly displaying the most perfect, fiercely fabulous heels to accompany my skirt. See? And they're named "Spankin". I like it.

Throw on a belt like this...(I'm thinking of making one myself, actually, but that might be slightly disastrous to say the least) and then some cutesy black jewelry like this bracelet (of which various searches has failed to find me anything overly fantastic, shame on you, Google),

find myself a cute little clutch (hello, Ebay!) and I think I shall be ready!

Sunday

Ahh, shopping. I heart it.

Which means, naturally, I was champing at the bit to get to the new, 60,000 square metre DFO at South Wharf (How has this been open for over a month and I've yet to visit it?). After our arrival, and splurge on all things 'preppy' at American Cargo, we were evacuated whilst waiting in line with our purchases in the second store we visited. Evacuated! We pondered why this may have been - bomb threat, gas leak, God's way of telling us the credit cards were maxed? Either way, it turned out well - we were soon nibbling on deliciously scrumptious club sandwiches and sipping wine at the Hilton while we waited to get our shop back on. (Sidenote: I wasn't super impressed with the Hilton's tapas/wine bar. The food and drink itself was fabulous, but the building...meh. There was an egagement party in full swing whilst we were there, and I mentioned to Cam that it certainly wouldn't be my first choice of venue for a function. It seemed a bit... outdated and boring? I was expecting a more uber modern, arty kind of feel...alas).

Once we were back in the cavernous maze that is DFO, we lost all form of time, direction and sanity (I speak for myself here, but once Cam realized the gorgeous shirts in Guess were heavily discounted, I must admit I did see a slightly demonic gleam in his eye...).

I purchased the most adorable tutu skirt, practically identical to Carrie's in the opening credits on S&TC... ...which I have every intention of rocking out in New Years Eve, along with the new shoes I purchased from the Wittner outlet. Yes...WITTNER, otherwise known as The Mecca to Sarah and myself. Cam did suggest they look slightly like crazy lady desert boots, whatever that means, but I choose to think they are simply fabulous.

I also purchased something I know Sarah will adore for Christmas, along with a wall decal of the Eiffel Tower (to match the massive print I have above the fireplace, and various items of jewelry depicting the statue I have) I plan on putting in my walk in robe, once I've finished painting it.

All in all, it was a pretty fantastic day, topped off with a scrummy roast dinner and immediately after this, reading my favorite bits of the Sunday Herald in bed with a cuppa.

Hope your weekend has been as fun :)

Slow Saturday

* Today seems to have gone on forever. It started off taxing my dear father around to do his chores - honestly, it scares me more and more when I see him and realize where my temper and various other traits come from. But - finally! - the enormous Huntsman spider has been located and forcibly removed from the Jeep. I can enter it without flipping the sun visors, spraying half a can of Baygon and being paranoid it will casually wander across my windscreen whilst I execute a U turn or some such.

* We purchased the most divine bed today. Think black studded leather, retro porn movie, uber bachelor pad meets modern cat scratching pole... yum. It gets delivered Wednesday...

* which is a good thing, seeing as I still have one more coat of Red Alert to splash all over the feature wall. We also (at LAST!) discovered the most incredible lamps from Dare Gallery, which were a third of the price of the hideous monstrosities we've been looking at for the past few weeks. I'm finally getting some kind of Katie-ish stamp on the house - although not quite as 'out there' as I'd like, damn conservative taste man friend!

* I had a much needed nanna nap this afternoon, and awoke to pouring rain. I actually had to dig out a jumper, I got so cold - it's bizarre that after a few days of 34c+, a warm 25c feels extremely chilly.

* After years of talking about it, Sarah and I are going to make a start on a project we hold very dear to our hearts. Hopefully if all goes well with our own personal attempts at awesomeness re: making adorable Christmas saddle pads and sleigh bell inspired bridle decorations for my two horses, we'll be more and more motivated to taking the plunge and designing our own range of gear for our pups and ponies.

* I watched Dirty Rotten Scoundrels with Cmac this evening, and found it highly amusing. I'm craving a Will & Grace-athon, but my recorded episodes from the newly discovered Marry Me Friday's on Foxtel will have to do.

* I received an early Christmas present from my man yesterday - the camera I've been awaiting for Oh! So long. It's fabulous - and I can't wait to get snapping with the great macro settings it has. I heart close ups.

*...that's about it for my quiet Saturday and even more docile Saturday evening. Looking forward to a nice long ride on the horses with Cam in the morning, then birthday shopping for his god-daughter. They're never too young to get addicted to Barbie horses, right?

Epicute.

This website is just. Too. Freakin. Cute.


I want bunny shaped sandwiches for my lunch!


...and these. These are also very adorable. In fact, I'm not sure I could even consume them...



... but I'd sure as heck give it a go.

...I did it!

.. the past two days. And it's more and more fun each time! (that was, until, Darcy took a rather large toilet break in the middle of the dam...)

Can't think of a better way to spend my evenings than riding with Cam, and sharing it with Sarah. She took so many photos, my email account died - now I've deleted some of the 4000 emails I had, I'm waiting for some more pix, hopefully some deep sea diving action shots!
But for now... bed.

Recent Photos

Cam came home from work early today, and we drove down to Red Hill to visit some wineries. We passed a few lovely hours tasting wines, eating wood fired pizza (totally to die for!) and sampling some more wine, a nice pinot gris from T'Gallant. It was a perfect afternoon.

I get sent this sort of thing via MMS. Someone needs to be taught that taunting me isn't a very good idea, and will, inevitably, end in tears.

These cupcakes were the 'dessert' at our marquee on Oaks Day (as well as tiny chocolate mousses, which were also delcious - I had 4 - but not as adorable as these). They were so darn good, I consumed 4 of these, too. But not the rose. I didn't know if that bit was edible, and it smelled kind of funky.

We put the Christmas tree up on the weekend, and were slightly worried how The Devil Incarnate Taj would handle all manner of sparkly, bulbous decorations, but after a thorough investigation of the tree itself, she seems content simply to stare at it.

My boys sharing a cuddle at sunset. They rock my world.

Damn straight, we're hot little elves. On Dancer, on Prancer - Mush!


Sahara...is that you trapped in that vending machine...?!?

...and finally...
Darcy and I this evening :)
(I really must photoshop me out of that picture...ick!)

Momentous Occasions

What are the similarities between this photo, of me on Kaptain in October last year at a local beach, and the video below of me on Gypsy in Vanuatu, except the obvious of both involving horses and oceans?



Those are the two happiest days of my life.

I had dreamed about those moments for as long as I can remember, and my life's ambition kicked in as soon as those horses set foot in the surf. Today?

I hope it's to be number 3 on my days of momentous occasions. As soon as I learned the property where I bought Altibo from had a huge dam and water jumps, and that he loved nothing more than swimming his days away in them, I made the decision to move Darcy there so we could have the opportunity to do it. The past few weeks, I've been watching very small children on even smaller ponies trot merrily off to the back paddock, while I wistfully pat the boys and tell them, and myself, that one day I'll be good enough to do it.

Good enough? Bugger that. This week is all about doing things I've previously been too scared to do (hello, last nights blog post) and today, I'm jumping on those boys and taking them in, freezing weather or no freezing weather.

Now, what does one wear to get drenched by manky dam water...?

Seeing Red

I've been feeling somewhat disturbed by the fact my house doesn't feel much like my home. To me, my house should represent security and happiness and comfort, feel like a sanctuary and as though it envelopes me in a big hug when I step through its doors. And although various websites suggest the best way to achieve ambiance is by using soft, pastel colours and creating harmony, I kind of went the other extreme. Cam came home to find the bedroom awash with color...
..and also came home with a present of his own, these beautiful (insert name of flower here). One of those freaky moments where we seem to have shared a thought pattern - these flowers are not far off identical to the color of the wall I painted today.

In other news... I spent hours traipsing around looking for lamps whilst I waited for my dad to arrive at his home where I was waiting with his rehabilitation chairs/stools etc, and I had a great time with my girl tonight - we went and played with the ponies together, and she introduced herself to a very handsome gelding I've been admiring for a long time. If only we could spend our nights and weekends riding off into the sunset! Perfection :)

Cam's been removed from honorary blogger....

..and I am back, sort of. I actually woke up and realized I hadn't blogged, and had to drag myself from my ever so comfy bed to do this. Today was the day - our tree went up! I had a horrible, awful day due to my atrocious behavior yesterday, and felt the only way to get over it (after apologizing profusely to certain people) was to do some things around the house to make it feel more like home. And what could be better than putting up our tree! It's the first time Cam and I have celebrated Christmas together, and have embarked on a silver and blue theme (photos to come, naturally). He'll be overseas for Christmas, and at first, I was against celebrating it as we won't be around to enjoy it, but as soon as the decorations started filtering into the shops, I couldn't contain my excitement. I wish my gorgeous girl Bec lived that bit closer so we could share our crazy joy together.. still, one day I shall have a white Christmas with her!

...I am wondering, rather, whether there will be any tree and/or decorations left come morning. Sabataj is named that way for a reason, and already there's been some firing of water pistols to disable her from hanging off baubles.

Fill in role

Hi this is Cameron and I'm Katie's man-friend. Unfortunately Katie is ill and unable to post tonite, so I've been given the challenging task of providing a post in her absence full of wit, humour and charm. Clearly, that is far out of reach after the alcohol drunk today. We have spent the majority of the day drinking by the pool with friends and you may think that Katie has drunk too much and is now poleaxed in bed, but actually...she has been quite unwell for several days and I could hardly let her scare you all with her hallucinogenic ramblings. So I've taken the pro-active step of posting today and maybe tomorrow depending on how she sweats it out tonite. Its been a tough day at the office, so maybe tomorrow I'll provide a few more tales.

I'm gonna wash that man right outta my hair...

...Altibo enjoying a post bath roll.

A different sort of adoption.

For the first time in years, I didn't buy a poppy for Remembrance Day this year. I feel awful - guilty, even - and after reading Melisa's post and various others, it made me feel worse.

My grandfather fought in WWII, and although he rarely spoke of it as he felt ashamed for what he had done (he was the Bomb Aimer on Lancaster planes) I was always so proud of his bravery and strength. My Nan worked like an ox in the Land Army, working the fields and keeping the farms alive whilst the men were out fighting. One of my oldest and dearest friends, Chicken, is in 2nd Commando Regiment - the very regiment affected by grief after the loss of one of their men in training only a few weeks ago - and is soon to be shipped off to Afghanistan in the near future. As a result, I usually hold Remembrance Day quite close, as a way to remember my Grandad, thank my Nan for all she did for her country and subsequently my own freedom, and pray for Chicken's safe return.

So when I realized this year had passed me by without my own contribution towards RD, I wondered what I could do. And then, I found Julesie's blog - and the amazingly wonderful idea of 'Adopting A Soldier', a concept I never knew existed, and one I plan on embracing as soon as pay day swings around. I hope someone does something as wonderful as this for our own Aussie troops, and my darling Chicken gets some love and luxuries from home from someone other than his mother and I.


On a side note, it's a shame one can't actually adopt the soldiers, and bring them on home when they're done with their duty, kind of like a race horse or sniffer dog. I'd know exactly what to get my mother for Christmas, if that were the case.

Re: Post Below

....I have an interview in a fortnight! Yaaaaay!
Actually, it hasn't altogether sunk in. I'm not especially worried by it - come on! if they meet me in person, they'll love me! - but I'm not in an exciteable, jumpy uppy downy mood about it, either, which I think is a combination of a few things.

Yesterday was a weird day. My dad had asked me a few months back if I could drive him to the hospital when he was due to get a hip replacement. I didn't think so much about it (except, naturally, assuming his 'other' daughter, Satan Spawn Christine, was obviously still not old enough to drive). As a side note, he shacked up with another woman when I was about 5, after my parents were divorced, and produced offspring. He casually mentioned it to me when she was about 5, and try as I might to make any form of effort to be even remotely nice, the child refuses to speak or interact at all. I'm not sure if she's mentally challenged, or just fucked up from having such a dysfunctional family. I'm going with the latter.
NB: I sound bitter about this because, well, I am. He devoted and lavished all his money time and affection towards her, pursuing her dream of roller hockey, (which funnily enough, had been my dream, and was simply laughed at) and so on and so forth. We came to a point a few years ago where I asked him to simply not mention her around me, as it hurt so me she got given all those things I longed for, like, you know, an actual dad.

But I digress. He came to my house early, and we had a cup of coffee (which he was later punished for by the nurse, and had his surgery time pushed back because of) and we were on our way. Aside from insisting on telling me stories of his youth - things no child needs to hear if the word 'seduce' and 'your mother' is involved, whilst pointing out local landmarks - and we actually had a bit of light conversation, which is unusual. Let me just point out (sheesh, the side notes in this blog are longer than the blog itself!) that my relationship with my dad has been somewhat....strained. He and my mum broke up when I was 2, and we went into hiding as he wasn't a very nice person. He's a rather violent alcoholic, in fact, and did all sorts of nasty things to my mother and us that don't bear thinking about. Mum was always more than happy (well, didn't discourage us) from speaking to him later on in life, once we'd been away for a few years and the restraining orders were lifted, and so occasionally, like maybe a birthday or Christmas or once or twice in between, he would come and visit us. I was pretty young and didn't really understand why he was a bad person.- right up until I was 14 when he did something to my brother on a family visit, and I ceased all communication with him once I realized what he was actually like. I mainly just tried to get him to play games with me, but I knew there was bad feeling when he was around from my mum, so I used to do things to him like unscrew all the door handles off his car, hide rotten fish bones in his upholstery, and basically be a little menace.

A few years back, I had my Debutante Ball, and there's a dance specifically for your father to dance with you. I wasn't having any of that, but I was a bit sad he wouldn't be there for my biggest day to date. I invited him - with a strict proviso there was to be no drinking - and since then, we've caught up a bit. It's only been the past few months - since I met Cam, really - he's been more involved in my life. He calls me sometimes, with nothing to say (usually it's "You've got ANOTHER speeding fine!") or comes down and doesn't rush off after the first half an hour. I still don't know what to say to him, really, and it terrifies me to see so many of my attributes are actually his own. Temper, anyone? Skin like a leather handbag that tans in seconds? My feet, my eyes, my hair, my fidgeting? And I mentioned the temper, no?

So, when he went into hospital, I didn't really think about it much. But when I left him at the hospital, after a few hours of trying to entertain him as he waited for his surgery, it was just down right weird. I was almost emotional. I didn't know what to say, or do - the only time he's ever touched me without force was when my mother and I had to make the decision to turn my Grandad's life support off after he had a heart attack. Dad was down helping me paint my room that day, and rushed us up to he hospital when we heard the news. I ran out the room as Grandad was dying and dad put his arm around me, for the first time ever. I mentioned dysfunctional, right?

So yesterday, when it came time to leave, I sort of awkwardly patted him on the shoulder and said good luck. He didn't know what to do, either, and went all sort of twitchy (something else I inherited) and said goodbye.

It's as though all my feelings of anger and dislike and hurt for what he did (and didn't give us) have sort of been swallowed up by... well, sympathy. All I see now is a guy getting on in years, having medical trouble and in pain with gout (karma's a bitch for drinking too much beer and hurting your wife, huh?) and now his hips and being, basically, kind of sad and alone. Satan Spawn's Christines mother has been off the scene for years, as far as I know, except to hoick the child on Dad when she needs a baby sitter, and I don't really know what his own brothers are like. He doesn't have a big social network, and so I, basically, feel kind of responsible for him, and I really don't know how I feel about it. I don't want to feel like I'm betraying my mother and ignoring the horrible life he made her live for so long, yet I still don't fully see him as that guy, as I simply haven't witnessed it much for myself. It's a toughie, and it's playing on my mind a bit.

Anyway, this post has gone on forever. I should have broken it up into segments, and then had something to write all NaBloPoMo long! Dad came out of surgery last night, so I thought I'd post this, have some breakfast and go for a long, hot drive and see how he's doing. Another weird thought...

Vet School

I just came home from taking dad to the hospital - more on that later - and there's an envelope addressed to me from the vet school. It's not particularly thick. I'm too afraid to open it.


I'm going to sit outside, have a fag and to calm down, and eyeball is fearfully until the suspense is too much.

I have everything possible crossed, and you should, too.

..10..or 11?

Today was another great day. I made the long trek home to my mums, and enjoyed a day giggling and chatting and trying not to melt in the 34 degree heat. As soon as I got home - my (black and therefore extremely hot) air con in the car is not working, and I was fried - I threw myself into the pool, which was heaven. How on earth did I live without that in previous Summers? After checking the horses were OK - and feeding them about a kilo if carrots each - Cam and I cooked ourselves some more on the balcony at the pub, then took the dogs for another beautiful beach walk and watched another majestic sunset. Looking forward to dinner with some of my favorite people, at one of my favorite places tonight. It's made for Summer, and overlooks the sea and boat berths, and is completely gorgeous. I plan on taking lots of photos!

Speaking of, I got my race day pics put on a CD today (I lost my camera connection in the move...sigh) and just uploaded them. As my computer's being completely uncooperative in the heat, I'll have to stick them on here after I take my dad to his hip replacement surgery (not quite sure how I feel about him going in for major surgery; more on that tomorrow, perhaps), but for now, my favorite:

It's too hot to recall dates.

I am officially about to catch fire. I've come back from a gorgeous sunset walk and swim down the beach (still packed with hundreds of tourists, and I'm used to having it all to myself. Imposters!) with the dogs, and the air con's yet to be freezing enough for my liking. It's been another hard day - spending the morning at the local market, picking up ridiculously cheap plants and snuffling through trash (no treasure). Cam and I very nearly came home with an axolotle, but refrained. After a tough morning relaxing in the pool, we ventured the the shops and as a result, spend a tough afternoon relaxing in the pool on inflatable lilos. And sipping cocktails whilst reading a Cathy Kelly novel. Very tough.

I actually had a whole plan of brilliance I was going to type out tonight, but instead - this meme I stole from the lovely Andie at Sweet. Southern. Spirited.

1.Where is your cell phone: Potentially on my bed under a large pile of clothes. I tend to misplace it on weekends, once I've had a long chat with Mum, have Cam only inches away and know Sarah is A-Ok.

2.Your hair: is how it was when I left the beach, wavy and tousled - el naturale, a freaky occurrence for me.

3.Your mother: One of my favorite people, and best friends. She's brave, and strong, and funny, and has the best imagination of any one I know; something I'm discovering isn't a given in everyone.

4.Your father: Is a mystery to me. I don't really know him, and now he's getting older and having medical problems, my anger towards him seems to be melting into sympathy. It scares me a little.

5.Your favorite food: Cheese, smothered in potatoes, or vice versa. I'm also in love with tandoori chicken salad, and anything from TGI's.

6.Your dream from last night: I wouldn't suggest I had any - I had the worst nights sleep I can ever recall, all thanks to my horrible hayfever.

7.Your favorite drink: Currently, the incredibly wonderful fresh mango daquiris I make. And vanilla infused Rooibos tea. It always calms me down.

8.Your dream/goal: To be happy, and learn to know what it takes to make that happen. Also, to show jump my horses next year.

9.What room are you in: The study.

10.What is your hobby: Riding, reading, writing.

11.What is your fear: Death.

12.Where do you want to be in 6 years: See 8, but add 'really, really well' to the last bit.

13.Where were you last night: At Cam's sisters house, enjoying a BBQ, the balmy evening, and a bottle of Moet & Chandon.

14.Something you are not:

15.Muffins: There appears to be one hanging over the only pair of jeans I fit in. It makes me sad.

16.Wish list items: The Will & Grace complete box set, longer hair, all manner of pretty and expensive things for my ponies, and a credit card lovingly bestowed on me for all the other things I'll think of later.

17.Where did you grow up: A small coastal town, hiding from my daddy.

18.Last thing you did: Asked Cam for a response to 'What am I not?'

19.What are you wearing: A brown, loose 'tent' dress befitting the stinking hot temperature in the study. It's the perfect dress for the beach, fat days, and spilling things on oneself.

20.Your TV: Was a whooole lot bigger until we bought this big house, where it looks tiny against the wall.

21.Your pets: Are numerous, and the reason I get "Oh! You're Cam's girlfriend - the one with all those animals!" instead of "Oh! You're Cam's girlfriend - gosh, you're even sexier in person!"

22.Your friends: Are few, but fabulous.

23.Your life: Is currently completely, utterly, fantastically amazing, and I love where I am and where I (hope) it will take me.

24.Your mood: Content to the point of smug.

25.Missing someone: My Grandad. It's been a weird week of that.

26.Vehicle: When I don't pinch the MX5, I have my very own sexy beast of a car named Eli, who arrived home only recently. He's a handsome, black Jeep Wrangler, and I love him.

27.Something you're not wearing: Jewelry other than body piercings. I just got back from the beach.

28.Your favorite store: I like ANY store, but I must admit, Wittner Shoes and Myer for my Wayne Cooper fix are current faves.

29.Your favorite color: Right now, coral, tangerine and watermelon.

30.When's the last time you laughed: just before, reading the hilarious updates on Wedinator.

31.When's the last time you cried: Yesterday, when I had a major meltdown about my weight, and fitting in not a single article of my Summer clothes. Shallow, much?

32.Your best friend: My beautiful man (Cmac), my girl (Seah) and my mummy.

33.One place you go over and over: The long drive home. It's beautiful, but exhausting.

34.One person who emails me regularly: Should be in my list for #32, the lovely Beccy Boo.

35.Favorite place to eat: Brighton Sea baths. It's the place Cam and I had our first date, and it's nice being a snob for a night.

...right, time to lay in front of the aircon and raid the freezer for sorbet.

RRRR Robbie....

Anyone who knows me remotely well, will know of my deep, unnatural and consuming addiction to all things Robbie Williams. (The closest of the close will, unfortunately, understand this obsession stems from my unhealthy fascination with the British boy band, Take That. And yes, it's still going on strongly behind closed doors. My mother bought me their latest DVD yesterday, which evoked a rather loud attack of the squeals in the Audio section of Kmart...but I digress).

I have waited, and waited, and waited for his new album. For three. Whole. Years.

When I heard a teaser for the 2nd single to be released off the forthcoming album - You Know Me - I was simply gagging for more. I tried every possible outlet to get my sweaty mitts on it early - and no, I was not above illegal downloading, bribing the sales guy in Sanity, and scouring every corner of the internets I could. Alas, I couldn't get a version of good enough quality. Until yesterday, when the album, Reality Killed The Video Star, was released, and I made my way merrily to the nearest store I could. In a horrific twist of events, I'd left my wallet in Cameron's car, and had to wait until FOUR P.M to get said sweaty mitts on the CD.

Was the wait worth it? I'm not altogether sure. I've had it on practically non stop since Robbie came home with me last night, and all throughout this morning, but only one thing is for certain.

I am as in love with this song as I knew I would be. In. LOVE.




- Give it some time to load. Totes worth it.



... honestly, when the film clip is as fabulous as the man himself, who could not be head over heels?

Just wondering...

..it would be wrong to dress Altibo up in this during the Festive Season, wouldn't it?


Hmmm...I thought so.

Shame. That and some reindeer antlers, and I think he'd be adorable.

Five

I'm back from Oaks Day, and I'm a little worse for wear. I scarfed down some Alfredo and am ready for a good nights sleep (It's 8:56pm, as an indication of how ordinary I am feeling), but remembered Ah! I have to blog!

I have no ability to think for myself currently, so will share a pearl of wisdom from my new-found favorite show, Will & Grace. How had I never been addicted to this before? Damn sheltered childhood! This line in particular had me rolling around in hysterics (or would have, had the thought alone not sent me into convulsions of nausea)

"I know what guilt is. It's one of those touchy-feely words that people throw around that don't really mean anything. You know, like 'maternal' or 'addiction'.

Gold!

In other news, the dress I'd been long awaiting from eBay arrived yesterday, and was the size of a small tent. Seriously, I could take shelter under it in a storm - along with both dogs, a cat and a picnic hamper - and still not get damp. I didn't realize an American size 10 was so different to an Aussie 10 - le sigh. Still, I guess I could cut the arms off, edge it with something pretty and use it as a rug. No, but really. There's no way a US 10 can be that big. Damn eBay people!


OK, bed time. Tomorrow marks the end of my Spring Carnival, and the start of my quitting smoking, cutting back the drinks and jumping back on my healthy eating jaunt. Good job I went out with a bang today - although 10 scotches, a vodka Cruizer, a lot of wine and a vast array of snazzy hors d'ourves (..and (3) mini chocolate mousses and an adorable rosebud adorned cupcake...) was a little on the greedy side, even I'll admit. Still, I'm sure my churning stomach will abate, and the room will stop spinning eventually. Ah, Spring Carnival, how I'll miss you!

...4...

I really must learn to blog in the morning. By the time I get on here at night, my brain is mush and my body aching for bed, and all those amusing anecdotes I had prepared throughout the day seem to have wandered off somewhere.

I hauled my weary butt out of bed woke up early and rushed off for the farrier, who for once was early and waiting for me to bring the boys up. After having a few giggles with him, and admiring the horses lovely, freshly trimmed feet, I headed home for a few minutes before my play date with Cam's niece, Gracie. I offered to fill in for her Mum for an hour while she was at work, and Grace and I had a lovely walk around the park, chatting with the ducks (who happened to be seagulls, but I guess at a 18 months old that's a bit of a mouthful) and wearing her out playing on the slide. For having never so much as picked a child up (OK, there may have been once or twice) and having no idea how one keeps them alive and/or entertained, I do a fabulous job with G, even if I do say so myself. The fact her parents seem more than happy to continue to lend her to me buoys my confidence slightly. And, to be honest, she likes me a whole lot more than her old Uncle Frogga!
Sidenote: It worries me slightly skeezy workmen check me out just as much when I have a small infant attached to my hand/am merrily strolling along with her pram. Shudder.


Once I dropped the Spawn off in one piece, I met Cam at home and we drove on up to the city to hand in my Vet school application personally, and pick up my Members pass for the Oaks Day Extravaganza at the races tomorrow. I am super excited - and nervous in equal measure - as I wait to see if I get short listed for the course and will start the interview process. I can only imagine the personal, hand written reference from the head vet at Werribee Open Range Zoo and the fabulous note from the RSPCA (thanks, Seah!) will do wonders for my chances. Fingers crossed!

After we ran our errands, I took Cam to one of my favorite places to eat, and we proceeded to stuff ourselves silly and snuggle like teenagers in our booth. He didn't seem to believe me - having never been to the Asian capital of the city - what kind of horrific - yet deeply entertaining - goodies one can find in the shops, and after we practically wet ourselves laughing over the Mail Order Bride catalogues we made our way home, with a quick stop off to buy not one, but two, fabulous dresses for me to wear tomorrow. All I need to do now is decide which gorgeous ensemble to wear, and locate some equally darling accessories and shoes...but for now, it's time to walk my poor, neglected puppies, who have been telling me. quite plainly, they haven't had any attention today.

Day Three

...and I came very close to simply going to bed!

I got up super early and to my dismay, looked out at the grey cloudy skies and gale winds blowing in the trees - not exactly the weather I'd hoped for to wear a flimsy dress in! Luckily, it cleared up a little, and we spent the day rain-free. After winning one the two races I bet on, I was hoping a little more luck would go my way and I'd make myself a few nice thousands on the daily double, but alas. Shocking, in fact! (For anyone who didn't see the race, that was a witty pun re: the horse who won...ah, never mind!)

I came home early, and ended up staying up later than I wanted. I've got an early start tomorrow as the farrier's coming to trim up the boys feet, and of course, I've got to get the photos on CD from the last few race meets! (I can't find the cable to my camera, grr).

Ahhh, for a sleep in!

Day Two.

So, to day two. Today was one of those days I ticked off everything on my 'to-do list' yet basically got nothing done. I researched a lot of horse feed (how fascinating, I hear y'all say), made up my Christmas list (I don't need to ask for a pony any more! ... Vera Wang and Christian Louboutin make the top of the list this year) and organized a few little adventures for the following weekends. I worked the horses, who were beyond loopy this evening. And best of all, I had dinner with my favorite girl Seah, and my most favorite man-friend, at one of my favorite places. Pretty, no?

Tomorrow is Melbourne Cup day - and for the first time ever, I'll be attending! And not just slummin' it with the commoners, oh no. We have Carpark tickets with as much Moet & Chandon as one can consume, as well as tickets to a rather exclusive marquee on the rails should the weather not oblige us with the sunshine we all have our fingers crossed for. Now all I need is Viewed to take home the trophy so I can be kept in the Louboutins and Wang as I so desire... giddy up!

NaBloPoMo - ON TRACK!

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Yep, that's right y'all. Every. Single. Day.

Basically, I'll be syncing this blog to the NaBloPoMo blog, and posting up some awesomeness each and every day. Seriously, if I can physically manage to do this, I deserve some sort of monument erected in my name. It will be the miracle of all miracles (well, except, you know, Santa getting to each and every kiddies house on Chrissy Eve, squashing myself into a size 8 Wayne Cooper, and someone as ridiculously attractive as Ryan Reynolds not being gay). Enjoy!

I've been lamenting the fact that, recently, I barely make it to my computer to update my FB page, post an occasional Tweet and reply - somewhat short, information lacking emails - to the friends and family that have recently contacted me. Of course, there's always a few Lolcats to be looked at (and laughed hysterically over), but when all that's been done and the tears have been wiped away (ahh, Lols, you get me every time!) I really haven't blogged. In months.

Sure, I have a lot more going on at the moment, and it will only get crazier the closer Christmas comes, but strangely, I feel compelled to get started again. I lay in bed at night thinking through and mentally editing the following days post, giggling to myself at how fabulously witty I shall be, then the morning rolls around and lo and behold, there's a S&TC to be watched on cable, a horse to ride, a man to keep entertained or realistically, the S&TC mesmerize me so much I simply cannot use my brain to any use other than think of shoes.

So, NaBloPoMo, you shall hopefully be my savior. Only you can keep me motivated enough to blog each and every day (and Horror! Even make time when I shall be frocked to the nines in my beautiful dress and supping Moet & Chandon all day at Melbourne Cup tomorrow! How DO you make me do it?) and read those blogs from the blogger buddies who have become a quiet presence in the background these days.

I am weirdly excited to see where this Blog A Day thing can take me.

Now, if you'll excuse me, the episode where Carrie goes to San Fran is on...


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