My little taste of England.

I love HobNobs. I used to consume them by the packetful in England, and will do so at any opportunity here, too. I came back from a rollerblade (I managed to shove my mangled feet into them, harness the dogs up and had hysterics going down all the hills in the area) and needed a laugh whilst I had a relaxing cup of tea and a HobNob. I inserted Peter Kay into the VD player, and had to share one of my favorite moments...



...enjoy, Ben :)

Beyond surreal.

Just to make my weekend slightly more amusing, Ben dropped by on Sunday.

Whilst Chef was here.

The two converged on the front lawn, admiring my Jeep and, bizarrely, talking boy talk.

Then, comically, they wandered inside. We sipped tea. My floozy of a cat whored herself over Ben. The boys joined forces and mocked me.

Just to add to my horror, Chef then cooked Ben and myself risotto. Then we walked my dogs like one large, love triangular family, and came home to watch chick flicks.

I can't make this shit up, y'all.




I'm also beginning to realize why it is I have a drinking problem.

Wanna see something gross?

I don't have much luck with my feet. Y'all recall when the spider ate my toenails?

This is almost as painful. Almost.

I wore new shoes Thursday night. I told you those things were evil.

The blisters got infected. That, in turn, made the bone go funny in my right foot, and as a result, I HAVE KANKLES.



I am repulsive. Hideous. DEFORMED. Worse than that - I'm not allowed to wear shoes for 10 days. 10 Days! It's winter! And I just got 7 new pairs this week. Feel sorry for me. I beg you.



Damn ballet flats truly are the root of all evil.

To Melisa, with love.

For my fellow tiara-wearing blogger, Melisa.

This is the tiara I wore to my end-of-school formal. I looked like a whale on the night, so I don't particularly cherish this one as much as my other.

My debutante ball tiara. I looked forward to that night for years, and it was pretty much perfect, therefore I choose to believe this tiara gives me magical powers.

My 'everyday' tiara - a present from my girl pal Seah this year, as she knows my obsession for all things sparkly. I haven't had a chance to wear it - yet - but I must confess to dancing around the house with it firmly ensconced in my pony tail when I do the dusting. It makes me feel all Breakfast at Tiffany's.

I tried showcasing these with Phoenix. As you can see, he wasn't overly impressed.

Tiara's, camoflague and general strangeness.

To cheer myself up from the soul-destroying action of the soul selling thing (read the post below), I was having a looksie at my old photos.

I think we're all aware I tend to get snap-happy when I'm down...or anytime, really. It's always been this way. So I thought, seeing as I don't have a scanner (why? why is this so?!) I'd take some photos...of my photos. I know, I don't get out a lot.

So, here they are... the sheltered, quiet days of my childhood.

(Beware! Bad quality.)

My best bud BB and I playing Can't See Me @ Wilson's Promontory when we were 14. My pants were totally cool.

The closest I'll get to Andy Roddick...I heart superimposed gadgets at the Australian Open.

BB & I the morning of my deb, just chilling like usual...

Chicken & I @ our Debutante Ball in 2003. As you look at this photo, think about the fact I'm 5ft 10, and wearing heels in this photo... Yep.

Look Melisa! Isn't my tiara wonderful?

Never! Or...maybe I just did.

('scuse the indentations on my toots. I've been wearing socks :)

I did something today I swore I'd never do.

I bought ballet flats.

I feel hideous. Hideous! I'm so ashamed.

Having said that, I was in desperate need of something that wasn't a boot, and was slightly warmer than Havianas.
Gah...no amount of trying to justify it to myself will work.

Tell me if they're cute. If not, they'll be in the bin quicker than I can say 'I've sold my soul'.

That'll be $6.55 - care for a pyscho with that?

It's a well known fact I am a magnet for all sorts of creeps and - let's face it - dregs of society (usually those are the ones I date..hmm). If there's a nutter lurking somewhere in my vicinity, he'll be sure to start rambling things at me and/or asking for 35 cents, moments before screaming obscenities at me.

Yesterday was no exception. As I was sitting down to my $6.55 of happiness in the form of a Venti extra dry Caramel Macchiato at Starbucks, and jotting down a quick snail mail letter to Chicken, I absentmindedly agreed with a lady seated near me that it was, in fact, a lovely day. Mistake.

She then went on to tell me the intimate details of her 11 year old daughters best friend who was being molested by her father, and how the mother drinks too much but it's OK now, because the daughter joins in and it's their family time.

What. The. Shit.

Anywho, I quickly rammed my possessions (which tend to spread themselves about me very quickly) into my bag and made a run for it. I'm getting better - usually I don't want to hurt their feelings, so I get sucked in for 45 minutes discussing how best to take the smell out of their Ugg boots, but this time I decided to get out while I could.

So much for my relaxing coffee.

The 'proper' photos.

The moment before I lost all feeling in my feet. 2nd day of Winter, anyone?

Pretty, slimy rock formation.

Ben doing what Ben does best.

The beach houses @ Mt Eliza

Trying not to step on starfish.

The split second after the sun went behind the mountain.

My absolute favorite, which I know I can take credit for!

Lead me to the cowboy...boots, that is.

The lovely Seah is off to Fiji to marry the lovely Tezz this week, and I am sad. I mean I'm absolutely delighted for them, obviously, only I'm a selfish cow and I'll miss her like crazy. So to soften the blow this evening, she called and asked if it would be alright if I were to look after her shoe collection whilst she was away honeymooning in the tropics.

It took all of a split second to say yes.

The day after yesterday.

Last nights post was not at all what I wanted to type, hence the deletion of is this evening.

It did it's job though - it gave me a 'lightbulb' moment this afternoon. I've been feeling stifled, and now I realize my problem is that I have too many choices, as opposed to my sulky way of thinking I didn't have any. And now I'm such a big girl, I'm finding it hard to make them all by my little lonesome. So, while I beat myself up working out my life plan, I simply mean to go on enjoying myself, and hope it doesn't all come back to bite me in the butt.

And by enjoying myself, I mean carrying on in a fashion like today. I had another wonderful afternoon, roasting myself nicely on the beach and drinking tea with Ben. For the second day of Winter, it sure was beautiful - and after fiddling about with an amazing camera, I'll have some wonderful shots to prove it. I did feel somewhat like I was being insensitive my loyal Kodak, and didn't want her to seize up due to my betrayal/sand in the lense again, so I took some photos with her, too. Enjoy.