Counted blessings and blessings in disguise

I've had a fairly average few days.

Actually, average would be an understatement. Although I'm aware of my slightly flare for the dramatic, this week has sucked the big one.

Firstly, Darcy had a vet appointment on Monday. After 2 months of physio/chiropractic sessions, corrective shoeing, magnetic boots and reduced workload, he simply hadn't improved, and it was time to get a proper assessment. It turned out to be worse than I could have imagined.

He has a degenerative bone disease in his off fore (or front right for the non-pony people) which will reduce his working life to 12-18 months - WITH constant injections and medication. The outcome was brutal, and basically consisted of put him down, or get rid of him.

Having waited 22 years and breathed, dreamed and thought of very little else other than horses, to have my dream come true shattered like that was a little upsetting. Horrifically, bone-shakingly upsetting. Naturally, I refuse to do either of the two options I was presented with. I gave him the drugs I was told would help short-term, and worked out a few other options of my own, namely retiring him to 2000 acres of horse-friendly land with Cameron's aunty and uncle.

After not sleeping for two nights, and having all sorts of sad thoughts about my poor horse being in such pain, I was awoken at half past five this morning by my mother breaking the news my greatAunty had passed away unexpectedly. I drove down to my Nan's to break the news to her, and spent a not-so-fun morning consoling her and my mother. She was the woman who took care of me when I was younger and living in England; the lady who supported my horse-crazy passion 100% and who made me realize where I came from.

This growing up thing just isn't the fun I was told it would be. The only upside is the amazing horse I rode tonight; Altibo. He is extremely talented, not to mention handsome, and I think we'd have a fabulous time together. I've even thought over options for keeping Darcy at the place Alt currently lives, which might actually work out as a blessing in disguise.

The only other slightly excting thing to happen is the purchase of a BCBG Max Azria dress tonight. I've never thought polka-dots were particularly my style, but for BCBG, I'll give anything a whirl.