Sunday, August 31, 2008

There's no nice way to put it...

I am a raging bitch from hell today.

Seriously, I'm scaring myself with how hormonal I am. Chef's taken to calling me Snappy Tom (which, curiously, makes me snap at him) and as well as the animals avoiding me at all costs, the Mac is practically shrinking away from my touch, perchance I have murderous thoughts about throwing it into the dog's water bowl.

One of the reasons I am, let's say, slightly horrid today, is that I feel like a bit of a failure. Ya know, being the ripe old age of 22 and having nothing to really show for it. My car's crap. I have a bathroom the color of giraffe crap. My dog's are all broken and my cat's deranged. The only thing I have are love handles, which are growing at an alarming rate; personal trainer or no personal trainer.

I want a real job. A grown up job. One that doesn't involve trudging through paddocks full of horse manure, being up to my elbows in freaks or having a mentally unbalanced Kelpie hanging from my sleeve. (Well, actually, I do want all that - and have it on a regular basis. Just remember I'm being a crazy woman today, and don't know what I'm saying).

I want to write.

And I do. I write all the time. Lists for this, lists for that, blog posts, random notes, cards to my Nan...but I want to do more of the thing I love. Settling down with a brilliant idea and nutting it all out on paper (Sorry, Mac! What am I saying! My ideas are so old fashioned sometimes). Sitting bolt upright in the middle of the night when inspiration randomly hits me, and actually following through with it in the morning. In a fit of mentioning to Chef I actually have a little notebook I write down plots, characters and dialogue in, there was a mad scramble around the house as he tried to find it. Alas, I am too good at hiding things (ha! It's actually in a deceptively simple location, which I shall not disclose for fear of him reading this and finding it). So, I got to thinking... if I do go back to school next year and complete my diploma in writing and editing..I actually have to write a novel. And as much as I throw ideas around and think they're wonderful...I can't see any of them culminating in a 250+ page book.

So, I'm throwing it out to all my lovely bloggy friends...

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your plots!

3 comments:

Melisa said...

Methinks that your novel plot must come to you in your own head...but I'm sending you good plot vibes, how's that?

And what color is giraffe crap, anyway?

This too shall pass!

k a t i e said...

Think of a revolting shade of brown, then think of lots more revolting shades of brown, and those are our tiles.


WHY?!

Melisa said...

Ewww.

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